Betcha didn't think this sentence would ever appear in the Washington Post:

The 35-year-old Texan is soft-spoken, self-deprecating and so cautious that he makes the man he's replacing, Ari Fleischer, sound like a gangsta rapper.

I am sure you'll all join me in thinking that nothing short of divine intervention could make Ari Fleischer sound like a gangsta rapper, but behold: Scott McClellan, the new press secretary.

I've got my fingers crossed for a first lady so demure she makes Laura Bush look like L'il Kim.