Free Verse, or "Holiday from Relevance."

I have never in my life had a manicure or pedicure.
I fail to see why these are pleasing and relaxing.
Picking at my toes does not make me feel better.
Paying someone to pick at my toes would not make me feel better.
Paying someone to pick at my toes would make me feel like I just wasted a lot of money.

Or perhaps I am missing The Point, which is
Probably to be Pampered.
But when I want to be pampered,
I do not pay anyone.

This is what I do

I take my boyfriend's laptop.
I set it on the toilet. (Or la toilette, when I'm pampering)
I put a Sex and the City DVD into the drive.
I draw a bubble bath.
I pour a glass of champagne, and keep the bottle chilling in tupperware by the tub.
I watch the show on le toilette,
I listen to le bubbles pop in the tub and in the glass.

I hope no roommates come home.