Wednesday, May 19, 2004

...and the livin' is easy

The cicadas are jumpin', and the pollen is high. But it wouldn't really be summertime without the first Capitol Hill sex scandal of the season (just go check out Wonkette. She's all over it).

Last summer, if you recall, we all enjoyed the escapedes of Intern Puppy Love gone Psycho. But this year, we don't even have to wait until intern season hits full swing, because this precocious young lady has got the jump on those amateurs, showing that you don't have to be a naive 19 year old to ruin your career with sexual indiscretions broadcast over the internet. What's a poorly written threat letter by a kid with a roman numeral compared to whoring your ass out to Bush appointees? God help me, I love this trash.

The wheels are spinning madly at offices all over the Hill, the pages of senate directories are flapping, Friendster connections anxiously probed, and your tax dollars, dear friends, are all subsidizing the most efficient gossip-research-and-dissemination operation in the modern world as all federal business screeches to a halt. That place can go from Anonymous to Outed in under 3 minutes, within a respectable margin of error, and that's something all Americans can be proud of.


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