State of the Blessed Holy Union

I understand that President Bush is saying something or other right about now, so those of you watching him must not have been watching the Ashlee Simpson show, and you wouldn't know that the episode covering her SNL snafu is coming on at 10:30 EST. If you get bored in the meantime, Jessica and Nick are having an anniversary in which they desperately hope that massive outpourings of cash on diamonds and champagne will compensate for their utter boredom with one another. Consider yourself briefed.

NICK: You know somebody told me that they only make champagne in Champagne, France? But that's not right, right?
JESSICA: (confused) ....noooo...
NICK: Yeah, but the thing is I fell for it
JESSICA: You don't think they make champagne in Italy? Gah.